Soon, begins the first year that I will not be working!!  Ever since, well, since I started babysitting, I have always worked at some job or another, but not this year. 

This year, I'm taking my Being-A-Mommy year leave of absence from my job as  a special educator.

Almost 7 months ago, I went for a routine doctor check up, and was told to go for a sonogram since I had gained too much weight.  The sonogram showed that the baby was very small, and starting that Wednesday, I was put on bed rest and needed to come into the doctor's office at the hospital to be monitored.  By Friday, my protein levels and blood pressure were still very high (although I felt nothing at all) and my doctor transferred me to a high-risk doctor and I went to Westchester Medical Center to stay and be monitored full time- leaving my 3 older kids- ages 10, 8, and 5, and my baby, 1 and a half years old.

At first, it was almost fun.  No one bothering me, I got to read my books in peace, eat in peace, go to the bathroom in peace- it was great!  But, after 2 days, I started crying when the nurse asked me how I was doing.  I felt so FINE, and I just wanted to go home.

After two weeks, the baby's weight was rechecked, and being that he did not gain enough weight, it was decided that he would need to be delivered.  After trying to induce me, and nothing happening... I had an emergency C-section.  I don't wish it upon anyone.

Little Adam was born, crying loudly, at 2 lbs 10 oz.  He stayed in the hospital for almost 2 months, with me running back and forth each day, pumping almost every spare minute I had.  Finally, at 2 months, he came home, had a bris and I went back to work.  I barely finished the year.  It was hard.

I decided that since I have always wanted to take off a year to be a mommy to my kids, this year would be the perfect year for it, and hey, maybe G-d sent me this situation to finally force me to make this decision.  Finally, towards the end of the year, and after asking a Rav, I decided (my husband said I should do what I wanted to do) that I was going to be staying home this year.

I hope to be able to keep a log of what I do.  I want to see and know that this year was worth it and that it will be the best year of my life!!!